Banana.

I couldn’t think of a relevent title.

A friend suggested to me that I try something to get over my awkwardness around people. She told me that perhaps I should make a list to share with people my flaws or anything that makes me awkward as well as my positive side. I kinda regret doing this already but if it will help and since it cannot physically hurt me, I will do it.

 

So, here it goes. Please, no judging or very negative thoughts.

 

Positive: I rock at lead guitar.

Negative: I get “stage fright” and cannot play guitar in front of many people.

Positive(at least in my perspective): I nag my sister and her husband for anything I deem unsafe, like running a red light or texting well driving.

Negative: I tell on them for it because they don’t listen to me.

positive: I can laugh at myself.

Negative: I’m very, very, very clumsy.

Positive: I can laugh at almost everything.

Negative: I can laugh at almost EVERYTHING. (I can have a sick sense of humor.)

Positive: I am very optimistic.

Negative: Yet I have depression.

Positive: I have morals and respect, which I am proud of to have.

Negative: I have TMJ (A jaw issue) my jaw tends to pop out, people cannot tell but I can feel it because it grinds so I have to push it into place. To help with the pain, I normally bite onto the braided hair of the Indian girl doll I have at night or bite on my thumb, which is confused by sucking my thumb. I DO NOT suck my thumb, I bite it. There’s a difference. Lol.

Positive: I find myself to be very friendly.

Negative: Perhaps I am also a bit naive.

Positive: I have common sense.

Negative: I have a few learning disabilities.

Positive: I am a huge animal lover.

Negative: I tend to enjoy animals more than I do people.

Positive: My imagination is my best friend.

Negative: I can have slight separation anxiety.

Positive: Compassion of all sorts make my heart melt.

Negative: Sometimes I feel insecure.

Positive: I accept myself as I am, even if sometimes I notice my physical flaws too much.

Negative: I tend to do things some people may find odd. Example, I write little notes wishing for good health and other positive things then bury them outside while offering one of my agates (which are beautiful stones I always look for.), with seeds and a lock of my hair for mother earth. While writing down negative things I want to leave then burn them to ash.

Positive: I believe myself to have a very open mind.

Negative: Some things my mind is opened up to may give people the creeps.

Positive: I try my hardest not to judge others, but judging is part of human nature. (Like if you saw a kid picking on another kid, you assume that he or she is a bully. You would be judging them without knowing the whole situation.)

Negative: I have a very addictive personality.

Positive: I believe in training my mind into doing just about anything I want, including getting rid of my addictive personality.

Negative: I have the startled reflex. If someone raised their hand up very quickly, I’ll jump, flinch, may even fall back onto the floor or act as if I’m about to be hit.

Positive: I’m a great cook!

Negative: I have a short attention span.

Positive: I love making people laugh, even though I’m not all that funny.

Negative: I tend to be forgetful and often forget what I was doing or about to do.

Positive(Again, at least in my perspective): I’m submissive.

Negative: I lack ambition.

Positive: I enjoy helping others.

Negative: My fears normally get the better of me.

Positive: I am very well at drawing.

Negative: I normally cannot finish what I start to draw because either, I cannot get it right or I get bored with it.

Positive: I’m creative, usually.

Negative: I’m not very smart. Perhaps, it’s the learning disabilities, but math and spelling is very difficult for me and writing is easier because I’m not so articulate and I often get my facts confused.

Positive: I do very well in stressful situations and am able to stay calm.

Negative: I’m awful at meeting people and normally mumble, hide or avoid direct or very long eye contact.

Positive: I can admit when I’m wrong and proud to acknowledge that someone else was right.

That’s really all I can think of for now but I’m sure that’s enough. And, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I somewhat feel accomplished. Even if no one reads this, I’m glad that I was able to just get it out there. I hope it helps.

Thank you for reading if you took the time to!

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “Banana.

  1. Great list! Your negatives aren’t all that negative, in my opinion. You have a couple that are (addictive personality, which I also have), but your self-awareness counters them. Don’t be hard on yourself. You’re not “weird” or anything. And I’ve said this before, but I’d like to say it again- You are very intelligent. I hope you will give yourself more credit there. I’m terrible at math; I can learn it if it’s explained in a certain way, but I always forget it. And there are tons of people who can’t spell. My brother is highly intelligent, but he can’t spell.

    • Aw, thank you so much! The addictive personality is easy to notice when I’m doing it, so I should work on a bit more will power so I can control it better. Thank you, but I must say, I seem a lot more intelligent in my writing than I actually am. :P I tend to get numbers and letters mixed up and often forget how to spell simple words, sometimes I write the S in my name backwards too lol. Thank you sharing your thoughts! I’ll take your words to heart, so thank you. (:

      • You’re welcome. Many people have no idea that they have an addictive personality, so you’ve already gotten over one hurdle. ;)

        Part of what makes you intelligent is your ability to learn and express your thoughts. I’m no doctor, but it sounds like you may be dyslexic. You did mention a learning disability. I know a lot of dyslexic people. Dyslexia doesn’t make someone unintelligent, nor does any other learning disability. Oh and I write things backwards and misspell simple words every time I get tired or hungry, so it happens.

        Anyway, once again, great list. And good for you for putting it out there even though it was hard at first. ;)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s